Knitting

I knitted this adorable little hat...on accident, but at least it fit my teddy bear. She's beautiful!

Fall Break

I'm home, it's lovely, especially since I'm going back tomorrow. My parents took me to see Little Miss Sunshine. I was literally laughing so hard I had tears running down my cheeks! We went to The Town, a little one screen theater. The owner is an old man who sits at the down with his dog and takes tickets. At intermission, yes there is an intermission, his wife serves coffee as the line forms to get cake and cookies. There are two suits of armor that decorate the sides of the screen as well as shields that hang on the wall. In conclusion, The Town is a gem.

Tomorrow we're driving to Chicago to see Rick and Katie for lunch. Then I'll be heading back to beautiful Muncie to get some homework done. This week will be rough, but for the most part, things are settling down I suppose. I'm leaving for Germany on Christmas day and on January 13th I'm going to Rome to take the Praxis test. If I pass, I'll still be able to graduate in May. We'll see what happens. Everything happens for a reason, right? Right...

Dollar

I took my morning walk today, at 6am as usual. And I found a dollar, in bill form. I smiled the rest of the way and sang "I got a dollar, I got a dollar, I got a dollar hey hey hey..." for a good five minutes.

For your enjoyment...

Hoops

I despise jumping through hoops, that really seems to be what this year has been for me. They're not enjoyable hoops either. It's like Mario having to get six golden coins, then still having to pass the final level only to jump over lava, avoid flying fire balls, and kill the evil man lurking in the cave who has more lives than a black cat on Halloween. Except there is no restart button, or even a pause! Sometimes I just want a breather, but it seems I can't get above water. Or I think I'm close, the surface it right above, the rays of light are filtering in, but then everything changes and the tide comes in, taking me farther from my goal. Having adopted for four years, I would have hoped I'd have fins by now, but no such luck.

Enough with the metaphors, I want to get out of here and graduate. Everytime I think I do enough homework, I still have four more novels to read, or I make great progress on my portfolio and then the rubric is flipped upside down. I want to come home and relax, but my house is so tense and I feel like I'm walking on egg shells not to piss anyone off, but then another part of me doesn't care at all. The three of us sat down and talked, but I feel like it's almost worse now. I want to write down everything that I feel, but I know my roommates read this and I'm sure I would offend someone, even though it's just my own ridiculous OCD tendencies.

I want to be out of Muncie and away from my sister, Ball State is the last thing I need to get rid of to be completely away from the path I once followed to be like Katie. I feel like I'm suffocating because it was the wrong choice for me to come here in the first place. I won't say that I haven't learned or grown, but I think I would have been much better off someone else, somewhere I was passionate about going and free to be myself. I feel like I'm constantly judged here against standards that aren't my own.

Plus, I'm lonely, so I've slept with this boy a couple of times, that I shouldn't sleep with because it's not fair to either one of us. Because it's not real, but I hate sleeping alone. Hate it.

I don't want to alarm anyone, this isn't my usual happy-go-lucky blog, but I needed to vent, and tomorrow is a new day. A day in which I have a midterm on early philosphers in my PoliSci class that is worth 1/4 of my grade, then I'm going to try to give blood again since my iron was too low today.

Awesome.

Decision Point 3

I'm working on homework and passing all my requirements to student teach today! I got back from an awesome trip to Cincinnati to visit Lisa last night. We went to services and danced with the Torah. Watching old men run around with scrolls over 100 years old is incredible. It was like watching someone dance with the love of their life, literally. (and I mean that in a good way) We went out to a brewery for dinner, I met Lisa's brother, Adam, who is adorable. I have a little innocent crush, not gonna lie.

Before I starting working on my homework, I vaccuumed the living room floor so I wouldn't get dog hair on me or my things. I really thought I was getting less OCD, maybe not!

Aida

I saw Aida last night with my summer buddies. I was really impressed. I had no idea what it was about, but I loved it and I can't get enough of the soundtrack now! I cried...I didn't expect that, but obviously it was moving. I'm always a sucker for a good love story.

Aftermath

It's not so much the feeling of hunger that's difficult to deal with, just the intense headaches and tiredness that comes with no food or water. Plus, your throat really hurts, it's dry, scratchy, and raw. I wanted to sleep and I did fall asleep in my 9am Middle East history class, which led to me appologizing to my teacher afterwards.

Another bad part is that when I actually did get to eat, my throat hurt so much it wasn't that enjoyable. Then there is sooo much food, and you want to eat all of it, but you get stuffed so quickly. I was a little sad by how little I could eat. And more sad how huge my stomach feels right now.

In the end, I'm very proud of myself for doing it. I don't know if it was more to prove myself to G-d or to myself, but I'm glad I did it. Here is to a great year. Cheers!

Yom Kippur

Today is the Day of Atonement and on this day Jews fast from sundown to sundown. So I stopped eating yesterday after dinner and ice cream with my family and I won't eat or drink (maybe a little water) until 6pm tonight.

It's crazy, I already have a headache and my throat is soooo dry. I think it'll be worth it.

100th Post...

It's official, as long as I graduate, I'm spending a year here:


http://www.boun.edu.tr/index_eng.html

Most random weekend ever.....

Yesterday Elise, Lani, Naomi, Josh and I went to the James Dean festival!! The three Jewish ladies worked with Lisa (our student rabbi) over the summer in Massachusetts at a camp. They're from Australia and are traveling around the world now! They went to Rosh Hashanah services with me and then to Marion where they were suppose to take the Greyhound to Chicago to catch their flight to Vancouver. After much complications at the bus station, Josh and I decided to take the Ozzies to Chesterton so they could take the South Shore into the city this morning. It was a fun trip up north, after stopping at White Castle, which was disgusting. But of course, seeing my parents, Nelly, and my grandparents was well worth the journey. Besides the girls need to get to the city. Now it's homework time, since I haven't done any in about two weeks. Oops...

Tomato Sandwich

Yesterday (Tuesday, September 19th, 2006) I ate a tomato sandwich. Yes, it's true. If you know me, this is very significant because you wouldn't ever believe it! But by golly, I really did. They were tomatoes from the garden I planted at Dr. Chang's house, and I baked them with olive oil and this Greek spice that my mom always uses. And I ate them, on toast. It was delicious...I can't wait to have my own garden when I grow up.

Rabbi and Mackenzie visit in the same weekend!

This weekend flew by. Friday night I went to services, where Larry unfortunately sang. They were celebrating two couples' anniversaries, one 66 years, the other 50. I can't imagine living with someone for 66 years. That would take a lot of patience. I told Linoy I would help her with Sunday School, teaching the 5-7 year olds.

Before going to temple, I went to Ryan's with Dr. Chang and Grace for his 81st birthday. It was crazy. We were there for 3 hours before I left, while they proceeded to eat. They're like bottomless pits.

Saturday, I went to the Farmer's Market, then to Torah study with Lisa. Kay and Willard (great name) where there too. They're an adorable couple and Kay gave me a great hug. I continued to knitting class, where we started our dish rag. Mine is light yellow and pretty darn cute so far.

DeAnna, Lisa, and I went to lunch at Panera...Lisa and I went for a run...I wanted to die, but I think Lisa was saying prayers for me so I kept going, haha. Ok, but seriously, I haven't run in the longest time.

Hillel took the Rabbi out for dinner, which was delicious, and I think they liked Lisa. Atleast I haven't heard otherwise. We went to see The Last Kiss, which was rather depressing to me, but I did enjoy it for the most part. The previews were so intense though!!!! Every movie they showed made me jump in my seat! We got FROYO (frozen yogurt, if you don't know the terminology) I love Incredible Yogurt because the guy that works there is so cute. haha.

I went to visit Mackenzie, who was in town with Tyler for Mud Volleyball. I love her, end of story.

This morning (Sunday) I went to help with Sunday School, there are only 4 students. It's so different than at home. They don't go enough or long enough. Somehow I volunteered to help teach always, so that'll be interesting, just one more thing I got myself into.

I miss Jamee, who is in Mexico...and I have so much homework. So I'm going to get busy.

DeAnna's Birthday!

Last night DeAnna, Mike, Jen, Chelsea and I went to Cheeseburger in Paraside for DeAnna's 22nd birthday!! I hadn't hung out with her in way too long and it was awesome. It's amazing how much you realize you miss someone when you're finally with them.

And I like Mike, DeAnna's boyfriend. I think he's more comfortable around me now. He's really funny, and loves DeAnna, so that makes me happy! =)

Interfaith Service

Tonight I attended an interfaith service (Jewish and Muslim) at the Universalist Church in Muncie. I found that the Muslims wanted to explain why Jews and Muslims are brothers and sisters (as in Ishmael and Isaac are brothers, son of Abraham) maybe some in attendance did not know this, but if they didn't before the service, they will know now because it was repeated quite frequently. The Jewish side of a little random, very focused on peace, as was the whole service. And on unity.

They talked about how there are extremist and moderates in all religions, but that's as far as they went into the topic of politics. It was agreed that it would not be discussed, but I would have liked to listen to the different points of view.

I met the president of the Muslim Student Association on campus, who happens to be very attractive. Go figure.

There was dinner following, everything was terrific. I ate a lot of food, and everyone ate the cookies I brought. I find this funny, because they were Martin Van Buren cookies, but they had a weird spice, so I think everyone thought they were ethnic.

Anyways, I have to finish a book and a paper by tomorrow at 9am.

And I learned how to knit yesterday. It's exciting, I'm not sure if I like it more than crocheting though. But I'm better and faster at crocheting as of right now, so I'm biased of course.

Akeehal and the Bee

So I just watched Akeehal and the Bee. I would highly recommend it everyone! There was a great quote, which follows:


Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Favorite Quotes

I'm taking my favorite quotes off Facebook, but I didn't have them written down anywhere else. So I'm putting them here so I can reference back when needed.


"Strong and bitter words indicate a weak cause."

"It's really a wonder that I haven't dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. " ~Anne Frank

"If your success is not on your own terms, if it looks good to the world but does not feel good in your heart, it is not success at all." Anna Quindlen

"In the lives of individuals, and of peoples, too, the worst conflicts are often those that break out between those who are persecuted." Amos Oz

"To be nobody-but-yourself - in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting." -E.E. Cummings

"If you can't be good, be sanitary." -Nelly

"I can see Katie with a man. You...I see you with a suit case." -Nelly

Labor Day Weekend

On Friday, I set the microwave on fire. A real fire, big flames. We had to use the extinguisher. It was quite exciting. We got a new microwave.

I went home Saturday morning. It was a great day. Nelly came home from the hospital, grandpa was so surprised, and Grandma Mettie flipped when she saw me. Daddy and I played cards and my mom and I rode our bikes up town and took a nice walk.

I almost stayed today to go to the beach with them, but I promised a friend I would hangout with him tonight, so I also didn't make plans with my sister, but then he decided he didn't feel like it 15 minutes before hand. I was/am pissed. Then he wanted to hangout Monday, yeah...right.

Plus, I got pulled over on my way back from Chesterton on 69. But I was only given a warning.

Tomorrow I'm suppose to have lunch with Katie and Rick, then it's all homework. =)

September!!!

Happy September!! It's cooling off already! But the leaves are so beautiful when they change, I'll deal with the climate.

Don't forget to change your calendars!

Daily News

So, they published my little response. The best part...they called me Andrew, THREE times!!!!! Cool...

A response I wrote to an article in the Daily News.

In response to Jason Hoskin’s column Israel’s attack on Lebanon necessary, I don’t believe the issue is as simply as supporting one side or the other, Israel or Hezbollah. The issues in the Middle East may seem complex, but the origins are a continual universal problem. Groups of people in the Middle East are without necessities. The Lebanese government is not providing its citizens with basic amenities to live comfortably. There is not enough food, water, or shelter in the area to live secure lives. As history has proven, without security people will rebel and gain these items anyway possible. Since Hezbollah is the only group in the region providing food, shelter, and jobs; the group is easily gaining more power than ever before. The same thing is happening in the Gaza Strip. The Palestinians are living under great human rights violations and thus the Hamas are becoming more influential. The organization has no need to recruit members when on one side of the fence Israeli’s have lush green grass; while in Gaza, clean drinking water is barely accessible. It is easier to blame people who are living well and to point fingers than to actually fix the problem. Israel is targeted in the region because it is a prosperous country that is not helping clean up any messes.

Yet, this is not unique to the Middle East. It is proven that hate organizations in the US, such as the Ku Klux Klan, target people who are without jobs, shelter, and basic needs. These people are desperate and are willing to do anything to be provided with security even if that involves violent acts. Also, after WWI, the US left Germany helpless, without any hope of a future. As in Lebanon and Gaza, hate groups formed and targeted successful groups of people. As a result, the country was so lost, Hitler easily came to power by providing citizens with basic needs they had not had for years. After WWII, the US rebuilt Europe and Japan. By providing Europeans and Japanese with provisions they had not previously had the US assured that peace could be restored. Why aren’t we helping rebuild Gaza and Lebanon?

The problems in the Middle East and the origins of the terrorist groups are complex, but to move in a peaceful direction, people must be provided with jobs in order for them to buy food, clothing, and shelter. If the 15,000 Lebanese soldiers Hoskin speaks of would provide citizens with these necessities and/or the government would create jobs, the people would back the government and not the terrorist organization in the region making recruitment nearly impossible. Right now, Hezbollah is the only political group providing jobs to citizens, but the jobs they are providing usually include a homeless fifteen year old boy and an AK47.